Why arent you opening the door?
I dont want to, and I wont. Guests should call ahead, and they certainly shouldnt be rummaging through cupboards, the fridge or wardrobes.
Youre not going to? Shes my mother! Shes here to see me!
Then meet her elsewhere just not in my flat.
Emma is the only one who ever clicked with my mum.
If I start listing how my ex was better than you, well both feel embarrassed,
Im not even sure about myself, Natalie says, nervously rubbing the kitchen table. If you were both so happy with Poppy, why did you break up with her?
Victor turns away, his face darkening as he looks out the window.
You know the story
I know. Then stop telling me about your Poppy, Natalie snaps. Otherwise I might become your next ex.
Natalie is already ready to take drastic steps.
She met Victor about a year ago at a mutual friend’s house. Shed also known Poppy, though they werent close. Poppy had brought Victor along, and a few months later she vanished from everyones radar.
One night, a drunk Victor confessed hed split from Poppy after catching her cheating, even shedding a tear. That made Natalie think he was a man who could show his feelings and valued love. Something clicked, and she felt the urge to comfort him.
Natalie realised that what she felt was more maternal instinct than romantic interest, but it was enough to start a relationship.
At first everything feels perfect. He picks her up after work, drives her home, sends sweet texts every day and asks whether shes dressed warmly. Natalie feels wrapped in his care.
She first gets uneasy when Poppy writes to her.
Hi, I heard youre seeing Victor. Its not my business, but be careful with him. Hes got a tightknit duo with his mum.
Natalie notes it but brushes it off. Love, she thinks, can weather such small bumps. After all, just because he had trouble with one woman doesnt mean the same will happen with another.
Thanks for the warning, but well sort it out ourselves, Natalie replies.
She doesnt want to keep the conversation going; it would feel awkward for Victor.
Victor, however, pays no attention to her comfort.
When his mother, Margaret Parker, first turns up unannounced, Natalie stays surprisingly calm. Perhaps neither of them fully grasps how inconvenient it is. Margaret likely worries about her son and wants to see who he lives with.
Natalie tells Victor to greet his mother, throws on a hastily tied bun, dresses in a soft robe, and, still halfasleep with bags under her eyes, heads out to meet the wouldbe motherinlaw. Shes already rummaging through the livingroom chest of drawers.
Ah, everythings a mess, Margaret says with a patronising smile. Youll end up with mismatched socks. Lets have breakfast, and Ill show you how to fold clothes so nothing gets lost.
Instead of a polite greeting, Margarets intrusion feels invasive. Yet Natalie refuses to answer rudeness with rudeness; she endures it.
Oh dear, you look exhausted, Margaret continues sympathetically. You could use a cucumber mask. Better still, get a checkup. I have a friend who
Natalie forces a smile, nodding, pretending shes fascinated by the health advice of strangers. Inside, she just wants to crawl back into bed; its only eight in the morning, a Saturday, and she stayed up late hoping to catch up on sleep.
Her thoughts drift.
Margarets visit drags on until evening. Natalie receives a torrent of criticism and wellintentioned tips on watering plants, cleaning the bathroom and polishing cutlery. She even gets a brief handson lesson. She feels squeezed like a lemon, while Victor never offers to help or to hint to his mother that they need a break.
Is your mum always this energetic? Natalie asks cautiously before bedtime.
She likes a big, closeknit family, but she also craves some space.
Yeah, thats her thing, Victor shrugs. She just wants a mate. When Poppy and I lived with her it was lively. Now shes bored on her own.
I hope we dont end up threeinone, Natalie sighs.
Whats the problem? Youre against my mum? Victor snaps. She got on well with Poppy; everything was fine.
Natalie stays silent. Poppy is eight years younger than her and loves to ingratiate herself. Of course they were friends. Margaret probably knows every neighbour by name, their ailments, how to press sheets perfectly and bake pies from her motherinlaws recipes. Natalie, however, refuses to sign up for that sort of happiness. Shes learned that the less interference there is in a couples life, the better. Victor, though, holds a different view.
My mum is very sociable. She can strike up a conversation with anyone.
Thats all well and good, Natalie thinks, but doesnt say.
Things get worse. The next morning Margaret returns, this time conducting a thorough fridge inspection.
Chicken eggs? I only ever make Victor quail eggs; theyre better for men, she declares with authority. Your shelves arent very tidy youll be eating that soon enough. Natalie, could you give them a wipe?
Actually I dont eat straight from the shelves, Natalie thinks.
Ill clean them later, Margaret Parker, she promises. We wanted a lazy day. Its a weekend, after all.
Victor, by the way, is fast asleep while Natalie endures his mothers endless chores.
Exactly! A weekend is for cooking and cleaning, Margaret insists. Grab a sponge and a cloth. Next weekend Ill teach you Victors favourite meat pie. Youll lick your fingers clean!
Natalie freezes, arms crossed over her chest. She cant keep obeying another persons instructions for a second day.
Margaret, could you give me your number? So you can call before you show up. I might have plans for the next weekend.
Calling? I cant even visit my own son? the woman says, pouting.
Of course you can. He now lives with a woman. It would be lovely if we all considered each others schedules.
We never had these problems with Poppy, Margaret remarks, grimacing.
My exs mother never knocked on my door at dawn, Natalie cuts in. She used to bring cherry pies. Want the recipe?
Margarets face darkens, a crease forming on her brow, a flash of anger in her eyes.
Natalie, think carefully. In our family the night owl never outsounds the early bird.
Margaret leaves, but a sour feeling lingers with Natalie. She doesnt know what to do. Victor doesnt hear her; his mother treats their home like her own. And the spectre of Poppy constantly haunts their relationship.
Poppys cabbage rolls were better her mum taught her, Victor mutters over dinner.
Let her teach you too, then youll be cooking for me, Natalie replies.
She suspects Margaret is trying to control her son, but she refuses to discuss it. She simply wants the topic out of her life.
A month passes without visits, then the pattern repeats. Natalie wakes to the doorbell. This time she decides firmly not to open.
Is that wrong? Maybe. But is it right to keep letting strangers barge in after a polite warning?
Within five minutes Victor appears, halfasleep, irritable, angry.
Why arent you opening the door?
I dont want to! Im not. Guests should give notice and stop snooping around cabinets, the fridge and wardrobes.
You mean you wont? Shes my mum! Shes here to see me!
Then meet her elsewhere! Not in my flat.
Victor throws such a scene that the neighbours must hear. He yells at Natalie, accusing her of rejecting his mother, and thus rejecting him too. Margaret shouts from her side, demanding to be let in, calling him on his phone.
Finally Natalie gives an ultimatum.
Enough! Either you send your mum home right now and explain the meaning of guest, or we break up!
Victor chooses the latter.
Natalie isnt devastated. They barely had time to say goodbye. Perhaps its for the best. She never wanted to live with someone whose exs stories and meddling mother were part of the package.
A few months later, Natalie hears unexpected news. Victor has a new lover. Their mutual friend from the same circle tells her.
We work together. Shes moved in with him and his mum, but she wants out. She asked me to introduce you, the friend smiles.
Really? Why?
According to Victors mum, youre the perfect woman beautiful, strongwilled, and a good cook.
So were talking about Victors mum and me?
Probably. Apparently, the mums kindness goes to anyone whos no longer living with Victor.
Since then Natalie listens to gossip but keeps her own head. She doesnt swallow every rumor, yet she doesnt ignore them completely.
She also remains wary of men who constantly bring up exes and cling to their mothers. With such macho dynamics life never works out a mother will always be first. Maybe thats fine, but only within sensible limits. Do you agree? Let me know in the comments and give a like.
